It is hard to dethrone Mimi when you are in a whirlwind. I know the answer is, sit, be still, and listen.
Mimi can be screaming so loud that it is hard to hear what is going on thought spiritual eyes, and ears.
My mother is almost 92 years old and was taken to a hospital what seems like a month ago in one breath and a day ago in another. In truth she has been there for a few weeks.
The short synopsis is as follows:
She had a UTI, was delirious, and two days later she was coming back. More tests followed. She had fractured her back. The x-ray of her back led to getting an MRI. They thought they saw a mass. Her knee was in pain. She could not stand on her own. Her lungs are in very bad shape, and she needs 24/7 oxygen. Her lungs were developing an infection and were filling with fluid. She has congestive heart failure. Lastly, she is almost blind and deaf.
With all that, it was time to make choices. I decided end of life care was the best course of action. Then so many other decisions had to be made. Does she go back to her cottage or does she go to end of life care? I made all the decisions and was grounded in my decisions.
Why do I share this with you? Beware of Mimi. Even when you are grounded in your decisions, Mimi will find something to scream about. If you’re not careful, you’ll find yourself in the middle of a tornado second- and third-guessing your decisions.
Mimi started up loud and clear at 4:00AM for me. You should have… You could have… You might be wrong… Maybe it is not her time… Is this what she really wanted? I answered all the questions and once again settled down, but Mimi being a spoiled brat, just started the questioning all over again. I have been in the same situation before with my father. That took me months to work through.
When this started with my mother, I was amazed how calm I was, how in these difficult time I was centered. I patted myself on the back, instead of God for the graces that have been given me. Beware—Mimi came out ready to complain, fight and frighten me. She was successful (at least for a period of time).
With help from others, seen and unseen I slowly became grounded again. Music helped me settle the thoughts down. What I also found helpful is that when Mimi started the story, I pointed out why the choices made were the best for all involved. I also remind myself I am exactly where I am supposed to be. My choices were made from a grounded and quiet place.
I ask you all to pray for all those that are going through a similar experience. Sit, be still, quiet, listen, and be aware that Mimi will try again. She has been Queen for a long time, so be patient with yourself. Thank you for your time.
Theresa Contaxis 