Step 2 in the plan was judgment. I want to add a point. There are times when I cannot let something that someone else has done go. I plan what I am going to say or do to them over and over in my head. Screaming Mimi is screaming, “You hurt me! I want you to feel bad for how you treated me!” She wonders how it could happen.
I have allowed Drama Queen to take part in my life a great deal. We all know her, sad to say. We like having her around. She seems to make our life more interesting. But it’s not real; it is not Truth.
Judgment always involves duality or contrast. So complaints are judgments: “It is too hot. It is too cold.” We also judge the positive, “I think that person does wonderful things.” How do you know that person is doing wonderful things? Do you know their motivation? Maybe they are looking to better their career or to be looked up to. Are they trying to get something? You don’t know, nor do I.
Years ago while I was meditating, I asked myself the question, “What is the next thing I have to work on?” I had lots of ideas of what was going to come up from the still small voice but never expected what did come up. I heard, “You should learn to ponder and not react.” Well, that was a shock! Of course, Screaming Mimi yelled, “That is not what I want to work on!” However, I knew in my heart I had received the truth.
When I was little and my parents gave one of my other siblings something, I'd scream “That’s not fair! What about me?” My parents would then give in and give me something as well. This only led to someone else screaming the same thing, “That’s not fair! What about me?” The pie, according to the ego, will never be cut fairly. That is not true when you learn to operate from that part of you that is one with God/Source/Divine.
About five days ago, I started the exercise that I suggested last week. I only made it two days. The other three days, I had a complaint from the moment I woke up. So here I am, back at day one. Today I want to share some thoughts of what I have experienced. Maybe it will help you.
I am developing my personal plan to save the world. From everything I have learned, I was doing it backwards for many years. I always tried to show others what they should do, but I have learned all I need to do is discover who I truly am, then honor and live it.
Theresa Contaxis 